Jillian standup paddling in the Santa Barbara Harbor in November 2018 about 8 months pregnant. 

For nearly two decades, I either had an IUD or I was pregnant.

Since I was 22 years old, my body had been in one of those two states. My menstrual cycle was quiet—almost nonexistent—and honestly, as a busy mom with young kids, I loved it.

No cramps.
No planning around my period.
No unexpected bleeding on family vacations or beach days.

During those years, convenience was everything.

The early years of parenthood are a season unlike any other. They are foggy, beautiful, magical, maddening, exhausting, and transformative all at once. I was simply trying to keep tiny humans alive while building a career and caring for everyone around me.

Like so many mothers, I put myself last.

Looking back, I realize there were parts of myself that quietly disappeared while I focused on everyone else’s needs.

And that included listening to my own body.

The truth is, no one ever taught me what my menstrual cycle actually meant.

Growing up, my period felt like an inconvenience—something to manage or suppress. I never learned that it could provide insight into my health, my energy, or my emotional well-being. I certainly never viewed it as a source of wisdom.

That perspective didn’t begin to shift until I started working with a naturopath who introduced me to a different way of thinking about women’s health.

It wasn’t a dramatic overnight change. It was a gradual realization.

I found myself asking:

What if my body isn’t something to work around?
What if it’s trying to tell me something?

Removing my IUD wasn’t an easy decision. In many ways, it felt like choosing trust over convenience. I was nervous. After spending so many years disconnected from my natural cycle, stepping back into the unknown felt vulnerable.

Around the same time, I began using Natural Cycles—not simply as birth control, but as a tool for understanding myself.

What has surprised me most isn’t the data itself.

It’s how paying attention has changed the way I move through my days.

I’ve learned that small changes in my body can mean something important. I’ve become more compassionate with myself instead of expecting the same energy every day. I can anticipate challenging days rather than feeling blindsided by them.

More than anything, this process has required another identity shift.

Motherhood transformed me once before. It clarified what truly matters: family, community, the natural beauty of where we live, and a slower, more intentional way of life.

Now I’m experiencing another transformation.

I’m asking different questions.

What deserves my time?
What deserves my energy?
What parts of my life need more space?
And what can I finally let go?

Listening to my body has become part of answering those questions.

I haven’t even experienced my first full cycle yet after removing my IUD, so this story is still unfolding. I’m sure there will be surprises, challenges, and lessons I haven’t yet imagined.

But already, I know this:

For years, I thought the absence of a cycle meant freedom. And during the beautiful chaos of early motherhood, it truly did.

Now, in this season of life, freedom looks different.

It looks like paying attention.

It looks like trusting my body instead of silencing it.

It looks like recognizing that my body has been communicating with me all along—I just needed to slow down enough to listen.

After years of nurturing everyone else, learning to nurture myself feels like one of the greatest gifts I can give not only to me, but to my family.

Because when we reconnect with ourselves, we show up more fully for the people we love.

And for me, that journey is just beginning.

Enjoyed reading about my journey?

If you’re interested in exploring Natural Cycles for yourself, you can use my referral link below to receive 20% off your subscription and a FREE NC° Band. I chose Natural Cycles as part of my own journey of reconnecting with my body, and I’m excited to share it with others who may be curious about cycle awareness.

Get 20% off Natural Cycles here!

Jillian Cardona is an estate planning attorney, mother, and dancer who lives, works, and plays in beautiful Santa Barbara with her family. She is passionate about helping families create lasting legacies while embracing a life rooted in community, connection, and intentional living.

Jillian Cardona, Mamatoto mama and estate planning attorney based in Santa Barbara, CA.

Growing up as the only curly-haired child in a family of four straight-haired kids, I always felt like an outsider in my own home. My father is 100% Irish, and my mother’s family is from Nicaragua—together, they gave me thick, waist-length curls that no one knew how to handle. I vividly remember the feeling of my mom yanking a brush through my dry, tangled hair, trying to force it into tight braided ponytails I didn’t want. I cried. A lot.

When I was a teenager, I had my first real act of rebellion: I hacked off my curls with a pair of kitchen scissors. The result wasn’t flattering, and my mother cried. But that dramatic cut was the beginning of a long journey back to myself. It wasn’t until college that I truly learned how to care for my hair—and how to love it. What once made me feel ostracized and outcast has become a deep source of joy and pride. Now, as a mother, I’m determined to break that cycle and teach my child that curly hair is not just beautiful—it’s worthy of celebration and proper care.

Tools You Need to Support Your Child’s Curls

Caring for curly hair isn’t complicated—it just requires the right tools and a bit of patience. Here’s what I keep in our home to make every wash day a win (these links are affiliate links that benefit Mamatoto and help us support mamas in our community at no cost to you! Thanks for your support!):

• Silk Pillowcase: Keeps curls smooth overnight by reducing friction and preventing frizz and breakage. It’s a small swap with big results.

• Honest Kids Detangler: A gentle, effective detangler that helps loosen knots without tears or tension.

• High-Slip Conditioner: Conditioner with “slip” makes a world of difference. It helps your detangling brush glide through knots with ease.

• Curly-Friendly Brush: I rotate between three go-to options: the Wet Brush, Bounce Curl Brush, and the classic Denman Brush—each one respects curls and reduces damage.

• Microfiber Towel: Traditional towels cause frizz. A microfiber towel gently absorbs moisture without roughing up the curl pattern.

• Soft Ponytail Holders (Scrunchy Style): Say goodbye to tight elastics. Scrunchies are gentler and don’t cause breakage.

Simple Rules to Protect and Celebrate Your Child’s Curls

1. Only Brush When Wet: Never brush curly hair when it’s dry. Always detangle when the hair is wet and coated with conditioner or detangler.

2. Be Gentle: Start from the ends and work your way up in sections. Detangling should feel like a soothing ritual, not a battle.

3. Get Dry Haircuts: To keep curls shaped according to their natural pattern, haircuts should be done dry, not wet.

4. Preserve Curls Overnight: Have your child sleep on a silk pillowcase and loosely tie hair up into a high “pineapple” style if it’s long.

5. Make It a Bonding Experience: Turn wash day into a calm, positive ritual. Talk about how special and beautiful their hair is. Teach them to care for it with pride.

2. Aquaphor

Many MAMATOTO moms have recommended Aquaphor for stubborn diaper rashes. Aquaphor is a classic for a reason! If using cloth diapers make sure to use a liner. 

4. NOW Shea Butter

Shea butter is a wonderful moisturizer and has just a little bit more umph than coconut oil alone. Mamas that use shea butter love it because creates a natural barrier for the irritated skin, giving it a chance to heal. 

Did your fave not make the list? Comment below to share your mama wisdom!

Welcome to Our New Journal

We are so excited you found us! 

My name is Jillian and I am the Creative Director behind MAMATOTO’s revamp!